Wife

There will never be, nor has there ever been someone more important, more caring, more loving, more understanding, more beautiful, more encouraging, more supporting, more forgiving, or more loyal in my life than you.

I love you more than words will ever allow me the luxury of elaborating on. You are everything to me, and without you behind me pushing me to be better I would be lost and alone. This time last year we were holding our breath waiting for that life changing moment where I stumbled through putting your wedding band on your finger and saying "I do". A phrase that will forever echo in my memory.

I still remember your face that day, staring into your eyes knowing that I married my best friend, knowing that I would love you and cherish you all the days I am alive, and into eternity.

I know lately we get lost in the struggle of our daily lives, and I know I do not stop enough to tell you how much I appreciate you, and how much I love you, but I want you to know that I do very much so, with every ounce of energy I have in me.

I could not, nor would I change anything about you, and I could not pick anyone better to spend my days with. So if I forget to tell you I love you, and you need to hear it, you can always come here and read it, and I will do my best to remember.

We did manage to get a lot done this year, though we have not met all of our goals, we did do a few things that bettered our position.

• we moved out of warren into a nicer house
• we have a back yard
• we had a beautiful baby girl
• you have almost finished your bachelors degree
• I am starting a new career
• we sold the bmw
• we bought a second car
• we figured out a method to raise our son that seems to work
• you got a part time job teaching dance, which you love
• I got over my fear of you teaching dance
• we got health insurance after a lot of back and forth
• we had fun at a toy store

And the list goes on....

I love you Sara Norman with all of my core, do not for a moment forget it.

Little help here please

So the other night I asked Aidan to pick up an easel in his room, he said "Ok daddy" and began to lift it.

He got it to about waist level and then looked at me and grunted "a little help here please?"

I almost fell out of my shoes laughing.

Later that night we got every cushion and every pillow in the house and created a giant mountain on the stairs and began playing king of the hill, it was a blast and we both got much needed time spent together.

I notice that when I do give him attention he is much more receptive to following direction and listening.

I still need to find a balance between work, family, and website work, all three things are necessary, and all three things have a direct affect on our future.

Stay the course (note to self)

This is one of those times when they tell you to stand your ground. To not give up, to not throw in the towel and run the other way. This is the point of the road where it is the most steep, and even though I may slip and slide down a few feet you can rest assured that I will not give up. I will regain my footing and push forward, no matter how difficult it gets.

Work sucks, deal with it and get through it. And remember you love your family very much, and you boast often about being out fighting for them every day, just take care to remember that when Aidan doesn't listen to you, and you want to yell. Or when your nine month pregnant wife is uncomfortable and snaps at you.

Remember that a man who is peaceful 100 times will have a peaceful home.

You will get through this, you are made to get through this, and you have the constitution to stick with it.

I cannot be conquered.

From my wife

Mrs. Darling: There are many different kinds of bravery. There's the bravery of thinking of others before one's self. Now, your father has never brandished a sword nor fired a pistol, thank heavens. But he has made many sacrifices for his family, and put away many dreams.
Michael: Where did he put them?
Mrs. Darling: He put them in a drawer. And sometimes, late at night, we take them out and admire them. But it gets harder and harder to close the drawer... He does. And that is why he is brave.

This is one of the sweetest things she has ever sent me.

I love you baby!

To my Daughter

My dear sweet Savannah,

The final weeks leading up to your arrival were a difficult time for me as I feel as though I have been struggling to provide for your Mother and your Brother. Although things at this moment could be a lot worse, which is what most people are saying including your Grandmother, I hope to look back at all this with your mother some day and laugh it off.

We both wished for you so long ago. Your mother will tell you someday how she knew the both of us were going to get married before I did. But I will own up to knowing my first born daughter would always come while your mom was convinced you would be a boy. You should have seen how much your mother cried when she found out you were a girl, she was so very happy. Certainly I have waited for you all of my life, as I spent my days growing up wishing to be a father and the best one at that.

Though for the moment I struggle with an internal conflict, as certain things will and have changed with your imminent arrival. But these things I let go of to become a better person. I quit smoking when your mother was about a month pregnant with you. I started taking TaeKwonDo such that I could someday teach it to you and your brother, and protect you two and your mother if ever needed. Now in the weeks leading up to you joining us, the last in my life is cast aside to be reserved for Vacations alone with your Mother. Which to me is a sign that I am no longer young any more.

Your mother has a tatoo of a phoenix on her arm, when your brother was born, much like the phoenix, she had to burn out and then be born again from the ashes to fly to new heights. I am feeling much like that phoenix, burning out only to rise again to new heights and to burn ever so brightly.

I am ready for you now, ready to always protect you, and to fight for you as I do for your mother and brother. I will always be here for you and I will always try my best to make sure you have the things that you want and need.

I am patiently waiting to meet you, my daughter.

With all my love,

Daddy

WTF

I need to get my fking shit together.

Squire Aidan

I'm starting to realize lately just how much Aidan looks up to me and wants to be just like me.

The other day he carried a 12 pack of soda from the car up the stairs into the kitchen while saying the whole time "look daddy I'm strong just like you".

At home during the day he does what he can to help his mommy who is almost seven months pregnant. He is already starting to show his nobility, and his willingness to do the right thing. Knightly values I will impart on all of my sons such that they will all carry my grandfather's name with honor and dignity. I see him years from now as a leader and someone who stands up for justice and always does what is honorable and correct, someone who doesn't give up when things get tough, and someone who will protect the meek from the mighty.

Fatherhood is everything I dreamed it would be, I'm just glad I was right all those years ago.